Caregiving For a Loved One with Memory Loss
12 Oct 2024 by Ted Escobedo 3 min read
Experts believe that family caregivers need to be vigilant about their loved ones’ short-term memory deficits that pose safety issues — for example, taking medications incorrectly. But they also must manage their own emotional reactions to a care recipient's forgetfulness to cease making critical comments. How can we cope with a loved one's memory loss? Here are some ideas.
• Let go of your memories
Forgetting who our dementia-afflicted family members used to be isn't an option. We remember well their unique personalities, special capabilities and proud accomplishments, especially when we still catch small glimpses of who they were during their occasional moments of lucidity. But to accept them as they are today and help them do as well as they can, we must loosen the grip of those powerful memories. Consider using mindfulness practices, such as breathing exercises and meditation, to step fully into the present moments with them, even if their current condition pains you. We want to be focused and aware, so we can respond to them with compassion as they are, not as they were.
• Modify your expectations
Expecting a loved one to remember the details of a conversation or plan is a setup for failure — or, possibly, a script for showing them up. It is futile and unfair. But that doesn't mean we should treat them as incapable children. Rather, we must remain aware of their growing weaknesses and provide them with just enough support to help them perform as well as they can — perhaps giving them prompts or gentle reminders to stimulate their recollections.
Think about the power of your words
• Health & Wellness
People with dementia, particularly in the early stages of the disease, are often highly sensitive about the cognitive mistakes they make and feel vulnerable to their own and others’ criticism. Any negative judgments we render out of concern, frustration or thoughtlessness will instantly pierce them to the core, stripping them of their dignity. To support our loved ones and strengthen, not weaken, our relationships with them, we need to curb our corrections and instead point out whenever they perform adequately. Positive reinforcement is a better path toward solace.
Source: www.aarp.org
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- Emotional Health